Bachelor Party

Ask Your (Unofficial) Best Man: Party Not Over Here!

Some of my groomsmen have mentioned they know some girls in Miami (where we’re going) that were “down to party” and they’re gonna call over to throw a little party in our hotel suite. I think this is getting beyond the stripper or lapdance zone, but I wanted some clarification. What do you think?

What do we think? We think your friends are hiring hookers for your bachelor party, that’s what we think. Either that, or they’re into swinging, and while we don’t have a moral problem with swinging, we think you should stick to strippers.

Strippers are professionals. They’re paid to pretend they like you. And even knowing this, most fiancées are uncomfortable with the idea that you’ll have them at your event.

Girls who are “down to party” (what is this, a Mötley Crüe video?) are your bride’s worst nightmare, an engagement-ending level breach of trust. Are your friends insinuating that you hook up with one of these girls? Because that’s an even worse idea, obviously.

The smart thing to do is to tell your friends a flat “hell no.” If they want to hook up with these party girls after your bash, then great. This may be your big blowout weekend, but that doesn’t give you license to cheat on your girl.

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