It’s a simple media equation. Recession + Weddings = 20,000 articles about how to save money at your wedding.
Sometimes the ideas are good on paper, not so good in reality. We’ve seen stories on reselling the bride’s dress (yeah, good luck convincing her to do that), cutting the open bar, and using your friends as photographers.
At some point, however, enough is enough. So, in a year that’s packed with half-baked cost-saving ideas, we humbly offer ThePlunge.com’s 10 worst ways to save money at your wedding:
10. Corporate Sponsorship
Really commit to this. Don’t just have the appetizers sponsored by Frito Lay–that’s the obvious stuff–actually incorporate sponsors, product placement, and advertising into your wedding vows. It’s not hard. Try it: “Rebecca, I’ve loved you ever since the night we met at Dairy Queen, enjoying the Hershey’s Kiss Blizzard, on sale for a limited time for only $2.99, using these coupons that you can find inside your wedding program.”
9. Ask Your Bride to Sell Her Dress After the Wedding
Or, for the daring groom, sell the dress without telling her. 9 brides out of 10 never open the box again; just ebay the gown and swap it with a white shower curtain.
8. Pot Luck
Channel the spirit of community. Wouldn’t the guests feel more of a sense of camaraderie, togetherness, if they each cooked a meal and brought it to share?
7. Wednesday Morning Wedding
Everyone knows that you can save money with a Sunday wedding. But why stop there? For the modern couple, the smart move is to get married at 7am on a Wednesday morning–providing your guests a nice Continental breakfast–and letting them finish up in time for work. Wait, you say it’s impossible to get the family together for a mid-week ceremony? One word: funeral. If Wednesday’s good enough for the dead, why not do it for the living?
6. Go Surfing on Your Honeymoon. Couch Surfing.
After blowing so much money on a wedding, only a fool would spend more money on a gratuitous vacation. Do the exact opposite of a vacation: sublet your house or apartment–stop paying rent–and then spend the next two months couch-surfing with your friends. This way you get to share your new life as newlyweds with the people that matter most.
5. Cut the Bride’s Makeup, Hair, and Spa Treatments
Embrace what really counts: inner-beauty. You’d love your fiancée no matter what she looks like, right? Now everyone else can do the same.
It’s sort of rude, when you really think about it, to presume to know your guests’ favorite drinks and liquor. Why not let them choose for themselves? Politely encourage them to bring their very finest bottles of wine.
3. Marry Via Skype or Tweet Your Vows
It’s free, it’s easy, it’s the future. Kiss those in-person weddings goodbye.
2. Ditch the Photographer
Who needs to spend $2.1k on photographers when your guests’ iPhones have 2.1 megapixels?
1. Charge a Cover
Tell everyone that in order to come to your wedding, they need to pay you $100. Be sneaky about it, and say that you’re also willing to accept barter. In fact you can use code and have them call it a “gift.” To streamline this cover charge process, you can even create, oh, let’s call it a “gift registry.”
For (slightly) more serious ways to save money without turning into Groomzilla, learn how to embrace the 80/20 rule.