Honeymooning on a tropical island? Baller. Honeymooning on a private tropical island? Bananapants baller. Private island resorts are the ultimate exotic honeymoon destinations, and often come with extra luxurious perks like butlers, private beaches and exclusive spas.
Exclusive is the operative word: these places will make you feel like you’re part of the .01%. That sense of privilege and entitlement is not something we’d normally encourage, but what the hell, it’s your honeymoon. Check out these resorts, but not if you’re looking to honeymoon on a budget.
Kamalame Cay, The BahamasKamalame Cay, The Bahamas
The most over-the-top place in the Bahamas is probably Musha Cay, David Copperfield’s private island resort with a $14,000 a night price tag. But Kamalame Cay is a fraction of that price, and just as nice. The award-winning, 96-acre private resort off the island of Andros is an intimate retreat of beach bungalows and cottage suites. Every morning you get to enjoy a hand delivered breakfast basket, after which you can hop on your “sand chariot” (basically a golf cart) or bike and head off to a day of lazing on the beach, snorkeling, or enjoying a massage in the overwater spa (which is reached by a boardwalk, a rarity in the Caribbean). At night, you have fresh lobster for dinner before drifting back to your bungalow for whatever nocturnal activity strikes your fantasy. Beach suites start at $625 a night.
The Brando, TahitiThe Brando Resort, French Polynesia
The Brando, which we’ve always raved about elsewhere was Marlon Brando’s private island estate. A twenty-minute puddle jump from the island of Tahiti, The Brando will fulfill your Robinson Crusoe fantasies—if Robinson Crusoe had a massive villa with a private pool and access to a pristine lagoon, an organic garden, a beach bar, and a next-level spa. You can go days without seeing another soul. One-bedroom villas start at $3,200 a night.
Cayo Espanto, BelizeCayo Espanto, Belize
One of the best all-in-one, one-stop honeymoon destinations in Belize, Cayo Espanto is just five miles from Ambergris Caye, accessible by speedboat or helicopter. It’s the most stunning private island property in Central America, with only 8 standalone, rustic villas (with sliding glass door walls, so there’s almost nothing between you and the turquoise,Caribbean waters.) The beaches are obviously private, and the food is outstanding (fresh lobster and mahi mahi with Belizean staples like plantains and mole sauces). There’s not much to do here other than get treated like royalty, so it’s perfect for two madly-in-love newlyweds like you. Villas from $1,600.
Peter Island Resort, British Virgin IslandsPeter Island Resort, British Virgin Islands
If you’ve got your heart set on the British Virgin Islands, and you’ve got $60,000 a night to blow, then definitely head to Richard Branson’s private Necker Island. But if you want to save some on your budget (enough to buy a house, anyway), check into Peter Island Resort. It’s huge for a private island (1,800 acres) and has five beaches to choose from, one of which is on the other side of the island (next to the destination spa). The main beach, Deadman’s Bay, is a crescent-shaped and palm fringed oasis. Lay back in one of the many hammocks there and spend your day watching the yatchs docked nearby. The coconut French toast here is famous, FYI, so get back on carbs. Rooms from $440.
Laucala Island, FujiLaucala Island Resort, Laucala Island, Fiji
Formerly owned by Malcolm Forbes, Laucala Island is now officially the property of Red Bull co-founder Dietrich Mateschitz. While it gives everyone else wings, the king of energy drinks has given Mateschitz the money to turn this into one of the most remarkable exotic honeymoon destinations in the world. There’s a submarine for guests, for instance, along with a golf course, the largest pool in the South Pacific and 25 private villas nestled among the pristine beaches on this 3,000-acre island. Said villas start about $4,400 a night.
Parrot Cay, Turks & CaicosParrot Cay Resort, Turks and Caicos Islands
Parrot Cay by COMO Hotels & Resorts is a favorite private island resort for celebrities like Bruce Willis and Donna Karan, many of whom regularly stay in the private villas here. You could even book the same villa Keith Richards regularly uses (that’s some weird mojo to add to your honeymoon). There are 8 buildings with 70 rooms, suites, villas and a handful of beach houses, all of which have four-post beds and more of a Balinese than Caribbean feel. It’s all about the wellness at Parrot Cay: the spa is one of the best in the Caribbean, and everything revolves around it. The resort is about 30 minutes boat ride from the mainland. Rooms start at $840 a night.
Little Palm Island, Key WestLittle Palm Island Resort & Spa, Overseas Highway, Little Torch Key, FL, USA
Don’t feel like using your passport for that private-island escape? No problem. Head to Little Palm Island in Key West, which has all the chops of a luxurious, five-star private island resort you’ll find in more exotic places, and is one of few private island resorts in the United States. You can only get here by boat or seaplane, and all 30 stylish, thatch-roof bungalows are set in that amazing seaside landscape. Aside from the usual luxury perks like outdoor showers, private hot tubs, etc., you’ll get to see a lot of marine life up close, as in dolphins, manatees and sea turtles. Rooms start at $1,340.