Sex & Relationships

Which TV Groom Are You?

TV is full of weddings, and with good reason, weddings are a big beautiful spectacle full of emotion, drama, and love—weddings make good TV. And TV makes all kinds of grooms. There’s the charming lip biter Prince Harry from the televised spectacle that was the royal wedding, the many grooms of Michael Schur’s universes (Jim Halpert, Dwight Shrute, Ben Wyatt, Andy Dwyer, Ron Swanson, Jake Peralta), good, goofy, guys who bring the romance amidst all the hilarious hurdles. There are the soapy dramatic grooms of your Gossip Girls, and OCs (Dan, Seth), there’s the cheap, bumbling Homer Simpson grooms, and the crazies who got married at first sight on the titular Married At First Sight. So, if you find yourself wondering how you’ll be on the big day, and start looking toward small screen heroes—here are the grooms to be and the grooms to avoid.

Be a Ben Wyatt not a Ross Geller

Ben embraced fate, moved up his wedding because it felt right and had the perfect ceremony to Leslie Knope. Ross fights fate, commits himself to a woman he wasn’t sure about, made all his friends go to London–and then said the wrong name at the altar.

Groom Tip: Don’t fight fate.

Be a Jim Halpert not a Marshall Eriksen

Both Jim and Marshall faced countless setbacks and disasters on the day of, and felt they had to settle for a wedding they never wanted. Both end up doing secret picture perfect weddings prior to the big public one. But leading up to the nuptials, Marshall panics, and shaves his head—Jim never loses his cool and keeps Pam happy every step of the way.

Groom Tip: Keep your cool, and your hair.

Be a Schmidt not a Turk

These two singular named sitcom heroes were both absent from their weddings. Both missed the ceremony for the most noble and well intended causes (Schmidt tried to fly to get Cece’s mom to come the wedding, and his flight was delayed, Turk took a surgery to get more money for the honeymoon). But Schmidt was able to reach Cece and have her hold the party with himself there on an Ipad, they then later married in the loft. Turk, in the final moments he could have made the wedding, went to the wrong church. They were of course able to get married later in the hospital.

Groom Tip: Know the location of your wedding.

Be Anyone Other than George Michael Bluth

Teenage George Michael Bluth weirdly tricked his first cousin, who he was in love with, into kissing him during a fake wedding demonstration for senior citizens. Then when the marriage turned out to be real, made just a whole bunch of lame jokes.

Groom Tip: Don’t trick your first cousin, who you’re in love with, into kissing you during a fake wedding demonstration for senior citizens. Really, don’t.


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