Listen, you already know that having sex is basically the best thing in the world. You don’t need us to tell you that. But what you might not know is just how good knocking boots is for your health and your relationship. So we wrote this list for you, outlining some of the most important reasons why you should have sex every single day of your waking life.
This is easier said than done. At this point in your relationship, you’re probably already having a lot of sex. But to make it a part of your everyday routine, like flossing, checking your email, or putting on deodorant? You might worry that once-a-day bumpity-bumpity will take the romance out of things, and that your wife—and maybe eventually even you yourself—will get tired of mashing your bodies together once every 24 hours.
But trust us when we say that getting your sexy time on a regular schedule is worth the effort, primarily for for two reasons: 1) having lots of sex makes you the epitome of health and wellness, and 2) your wife will constantly have the hots for you, and you will for her. Once you get into a routine, it’ll be easier for both of you to get started at the drop of a hat (or pair of panties, as the case may be).
Enough of the peptalk. Here are the practical reasons you should consider this erotic undertaking.
Sex keeps you healthy
Getting all up in those sheets not only keeps your soul healthy, but it also keeps your body healthy. Studies show that people who have sex a few times a week have higher levels of immunoglobulin A (IgA), which is one of the antibodies responsible for fighting off viruses and bacteria. So, if you have a lot of sex with your lovely lady, you’ll always be extremely healthy and you’ll never, ever get sick.
Ok, not really, but you’ll have a better shot at breezing through cold and flu season without catching that nasty bug going around.
Sex is basically exercise
Who needs a gym membership? You and your wife can be each other’s Planet Fitness, providing plenty of opportunities for sweat, stretching, and shocking various muscle groups. Seriously: according to WebMD, 30 minutes of boinking burns about 85 to 90 calories–and obviously, the longer you last, the more calories you’ll burn. Plus, if you’re on top you’re probably getting a killer arm, pecs and abdominal workout, too.
Sex each day keeps the heart attacks away
While it might be wise to eat lots of green leafy vegetables and practice relaxation exercises and mindfulness and whatnot—especially if heart disease runs in your family—it’s 2018, and nobody has time for that stuff. Instead, just have more sex. A recent study found that dudes who have sex at least twice a week are half as likely to kick the bucket from heart disease, compared to those who don’t really have sex too often. You see? It’s basically doctor’s orders. (Our lawyers inform us that we are not doctors, and shouldn’t be giving anybody orders. But you get the idea.)
Sex helps keep the spark alive in your marriage
Researchers at the University of Chicago discovered that the ultimate secret to a long and happy marriage isn’t compassion, honesty, or good listening skills. The secret, simply put, is sex. Lots and lots of passionate, sweaty sex.
This makes sense, considering sex gives you a nice boost of the hormone oxytocin, a.k.a. the “love hormone,” which is the chemical that facilitates bonding, and makes you feel more generous, more trusting, and more empathetic.
Sex melts away stress and anxiety, and helps you sleep better
In addition to triggering a surge in oxycontin, orgasm makes your brain release other neurotransmitters and hormones, including vasopressin and serotonin. This happy cocktail of chemicals makes you feel affectionate and blissful, and washes way all the toxic nonsense that you, as an adult, have to put up with every day. Plus, in the immediate aftermath of your climax, your prefrontal cortex switches into sleep mode, pretty much knocking you the hell out. Some women may complain about your quick retreat to la-la-land, but you should refer them to all the recent studies that show how important sleep is to a person’s overall health.
Sex protects your prostate from cancer
When you keep it in your pants for too long, the fluid in your prostate becomes gross and stagnant and full of bacteria and viruses. This can lead to lots of nastiness. Constantly “draining the snake” keeps the plumbing down there happy and healthy, so you don’t end up with abstinence-induced prostate cancer, which will definitely put a crimp in your home life.
The secret here is to keep things varied. If you turn sex into a boring routine, than it will start to feel like a chore. Keep it exciting, keep it fun, try out some new things—sex toys, bondage, scuba gear: whatever revs your engine. And don’t feel that you have to have penetrative intercourse every time: there are a million ways to get down that you’ve probably haven’t tried yet.
(Of course, if you do decide to concentrate on straight out screwing, be sure to use condoms. There’s nothing like a screaming child to mess with your daily sex schedule.)