Groom Duties

Inside the Mind of the Bride: Mother’s Day

As regular readers now know, from time to time, we turn to one of the less-crazy bridal sites, OneWed, for “her perspective.”

From OneWed’s Marta Segal Block:

Usually I write this column to give you a little insight into what your bride is going through. But this week, in honor of Mother’s Day, I thought I might try and give you a little insight into the mind of that other important woman in your life, your mom.

My son is only four, so I’m still completely responsible for his social life. The boy who says please and thank you? He’s over for frequent play dates. The girl who does Lady Gaga dance moves? Um, no she’s not invited. I tell my son when and what to eat, I tell him when to use the bathroom, I tell him when to go to bed and tuck him in at night. When he falls down, or wins a race I’m the first person he wants to see.

I know that this level of control will not continue forever. Somewhere in the next year or so, I’ll probably cede control of his bladder back to him, and some time before middle school I’ll lose the ability to choose his friends.  Hopefully, long before my son gets engaged, I’ll have realized that he’s a fully-grown adult capable of making his own decisions. Hopefully, I’ll also be able to learn to live without the morning tickles and giggles, and the look of pure joy in his eye when I walk into a room.

But honestly, the idea that one day that look will be for someone else, someone who has never been woken up at 3 am because he was thirsty, someone who has never changed his diaper, or gone to work in a spit-up stained dress, someone who has the ability to break his heart? The idea that one day the girl who does Lady Gaga dance moves may be calling the shots? It’s a little hard to take. I hope to be a grown-up about it. I hope that I won’t become a bad mother-in-law joke, inviting extra guests, insulting the bride’s choices. I hope I’ll be happy and cheerful. I’m pretty sure I’ll behave myself, but it may sting a little.

So, this Mother’s Day, be a little extra nice to your mom. When you were little, almost anything you did for Mother’s Day was greeted with genuine delight. Burned French Toast, ceramic ashtrays, macaroni necklaces were all treasured and loved. This Mother’s Day, go the extra mile, I’m not talking about a special gift (although, let’s be honest, she’s been wearing that macaroni necklace for a long time), I’m talking about spending a little extra time with her. On the phone or in person, let her know that you haven’t forgotten, that sometimes when you win a race or suffer a fall, she’s still the one you want to see.

Marta Segal Block writes the Ask the Wedding Maven advice column for, home to the Savvy Scoop, a daily source of wedding inspiration and ideas that actually make sense!

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