The Plunge Blog

Reader Jon L comments in our proposal article:

"Let me start out by saying that plucking a proposal from any website is just not a good idea. This website is great because they give you general ideas. For some reason, it seems to be the case that quite a few men have to rack their brains to be romantic.

"Men are OFTEN accused of being very simple (emotionally) but let's spin the table here and just look at a few facts that I have noticed in my 23 years on this planet (mind you, I am a social psychologist). Observation 1- Every action that you (as the male in the relationship) make, will have a reaction. The size or power of the reaction depends on you. If you have been with someone long enough to know that you want to marry them... you should know what things gross her out and what things make her say "awwwwWWW". Everyone is different. She may not say "awwwwWWW" but she is thinking it and you should be able to pick that up by a look or some kind of body language. Simply said- watch some chick flicks.

"Observation number 2- Check out the comments in this section. NOT ONE IS MADE BY A GUY!!!! This site is about HOW TO PROPOSE and HOW TO BUY A RING- Women don't have to worry about this kind of stuff but they are obviously possessed with it to come to this site and actually READ the articles. So guys- this obviously means a lot to them.

"My proposal kept her guessing the whole time... We have dated since freshman year in high school (8 yrs) and we just randomly take trips all the time so it wasn't out of the ordinary for us fly over to Miami (we live in Tampa) for the weekend. So I told her we would be going out of town for the weekend and we packed our bags. I took her to cocoa beach and had a picnic already set up by a hired proposal service.

"It couldn't have been better timing to finish eating because as soon as we did, our hot air balloon landed about 30 yards from where we were sitting... she immediately knew something was up. We went up. We came down. Not yet. I could tell that she thought that the moment was there... in the sky... she seemed dejected when we came down. I told her that we still had a long day and really wanted to keep her excited.

"The proposal service arranged for a helicopter to pick us up about 20 minutes from the beach and took us out to the Don Cesar hotel where I proposed to her on the top dinner deck. They drove my car with our bags in it to the Don where we staying the night in a rose pedal filled room. This is one of the biggest moments in your life, treat it like it should be. Spend what you can because you wont ever regret it. Good luck guys!"

Great story, Jon, and thanks.

A few things Jon did well that we applaud:

1) Flatter us.

2) Avoid rules. Jon recognized that there's no ironclad rule that will apply to every woman. If you are truly ready to spend the rest of your life with her, well, then you should have a decent idea of what will delight her, and what cheesy tactics will make her lunge for the barf bucket. Personalize, personalize, personalize.

3) Use smokescreen. Jon and his girlfriend often travel together, so it didn't seem too weird when they went off to Miami. Create a ruse. You don't want it to be obvious from the beginning.

4) Maintain the tension. Think of it like a cheesy romantic comedy, the kind that make a bajillion dollars at the box office. Even though every single person in the audience KNOWS that Kate Hudson and Hugh Grant will end up together, the writers usually inject just a sliver of doubt, enough to keep things interesting. (Or at least "interesting" for a certain demographic.)  Same with Jon and the proposal.  Even after she has probably guessed what you're going to do, she's not 100% positive, so you should let this tension build and build and build, until your emotional climax.

Thanks for the report. Keep ‘em coming.

And if you haven't seen it, for more on proposals, don't miss our 10 Commandments of Popping the Question and Romantic Proposal Ideas That Don't Suck.